FUNNY SMS

1.    True love is like a pillow U could HUG it when u r in trouble U could CRY on it when u r in pain U could EMBRACE it when u r happy

Want True Love?

Spend Rs.50 BUY A PILLOW

2.    Three dreams of a man:

To be as handsome as his mother thinks.

To be as rich as his child believes.

To have as many women as his wife suspects

3.    Child Donkey: Mum with whom shall I play,

every donkey is busy.

Mother Donkey: Don't worry son, see here,

 this donkey will be free after reading this SMS.

4.    Husband asks, do you know the meaning of WIFE.

It means… Without Information fighting every time!

WIFE says No, it means - With Idiot For Ever…

5.    GALILEO:
great mind
EINSTEIN:
genius mind
NEWTON:
extraordinary mind
BILL GATES
brilliant mind
ME:
master mind
YOU:
oh!
never mind

6.    I have a confession to make
ever since I met u its been hard for me to 4get u
every night I see u in my dreams
and find myself shouting
GHOST GHOST !!!

7.    Some times small
things in life
hurt a lot.....
If u don't agree
with me....
Then >>>>
Try to sit
on a Common Pin !!

8.    Wrote your name on the sands.....It got washed away,

          i wrote your name in air....It got blown away,

      so i write your name in my heart...I got heart attack!!!

9.    Your attention please
Thanks 4 ur attention. Now carry on ur work...

10.  Let me
draw ur
face!
Dont
MOVE!
Nearly
finished
OK
Done!
Wanna have
a look?
.,|!|,.
( o)(o)
  ( ,)

11.  Height of fashion?
Dhoti wid zip.
Height of secrecy?
Blank visiting card.
Height of stupidity?
Looking thru a keyhole of glass door.
Height of honesty?
Pregnant woman purchases 1 & a half ticket.
Height of de-hydration?
A cow giving milk powder.
Height of timewasting?
U reading the whole msg.

12.  This iz crime story
5 frndz lived in a room
Namely
MAD
BRAIN
FOOL
NOBODY
SOMEBODY
1day SOMEBODY killed NOBODY.
At that time BRAIN was in bathroom,
MAD called police.
MAD:Is it police station?
Police:Yes,wht iz the matter?
MAD:SOMEBODY killed NOBODY.
Police:R u mad?
MAD:Yes,i"m MAD.
Police:Dnt u've BRAIN.
MAD:BRAIN iz in bathroom..
Police:U FOOL...
MAD:No,FOOL is reading this sMs

13.  Today is Donald Duck's birthday .... :)
So wish him by sending this sms to every cartoon you know.
Just like I did by sending this sms to you...

14.  3 monkeys escaped from zoo!
Ist watching T.V. 2nd plays soccer n 3rd is...
Not u yaar ! 3rd is eating banana.y u r always think u r a monkey

15.  I'd love to take u out 4 dinner, make u sit beside the candle light, shower u with roses and utter those 3 magical words in ur ear "PAY THE BILL

16.  Roses are red, violets are blue,
I was born beautiful,
but what the hell happened to you?

17.  We will now upgrade your brain,
please wait....
Searching....
searching...
still searching....
sorry,
NO BRAIN found...!

18.  Roses r red, violets r blue,
Sugar is sweet, and so are u.
But the roses r wilting, the violets r dead,
The sugar bowl's empty and so is your head!

19.  This sms can only be read by someone SMART,
try again,
again,
maybe you are..
just not smart??
one more time.
hey don't force it ugly!!!

20.  I'd love to ask how old you are,
but unfortunately I know you can't count that high.

21.  How to keep an idiot entertained
*press down*
…………………………………
How to keep an idiot entertained
*press up*

22.  WIFE : Worries Invited For Ever

23.  Doctor : A person who cures the ills by pills,
and kills by his bills.

24.  How do you keep an idiot in suspense............??
Tell you later........

25.  Hello I am a virus and I am entering your brain right now...
Sorry I am leaving now, I can't find a brain

26.  Hey friends remember that without stupidity
there can be no wisdom and
without ugliness there can be no beauty.
so the world needs YOU after all!

27.  Minds are like Parachutes.
They work best when open

28.  Aim for the stars.
But first, aim for their bodyguards

29.  ALGEBRA: A weapon of math destruction

30.  Why were males created before females?
Because you always need a rough draft before the final copy

31.  This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog,
to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog,
for dog, 20 dog, seconds dog! ...
Now read without the word dog.

32.  All day I thought of you....
I was at the zoo....

33.  Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people.

34.  Hi there, I'm a human being!
What are you?

35.  Brains aren't everything.
In fact in your case they're nothing

36.  God made man and then rested.
God made women and then no one rested

37.  If you need advice, text me...
if you need a friend, call me ...
if you need me, come to me...
if you need money........
SUBSCRIBER CANNOT BE REACHED!

38.  News: 3 Chimps escaped from the zoo...
1 was caught watching tv...
another playing football and
the third one was caught reading this txt message

39.   A New Added element to the Periodic Table.

       Element Name:GIRL

       Symbol: G

       Atomic Weight:dont even dare to ask :-D

       Physical Properties..
       *boils at anything
       *can freeze at anytime
       *melts if handled wid love n care
       *very bitter if mis handled

       Chemical Properties.
       *very reactive
       *highly unstable
       *posses strong affinity for gold n silver
       *money reducing agent
       *volatile when left alone

40.  A beggar to another beggar:
I had a grand diner at ‘Sareena’ yesterday.
Another beggar: how?

      First beggar: sum 1 gave me 100 rs yesterday,
      I went 2 ‘Sareena’, ordered dinner worth 2000rs n enjoyed the diner.

      When the bill came, i said, i had no money.
      The manager called the policeman n handed me over to him.
      I gave the 100rs note 2 the policeman n he set me free.

41.  Teacher:
What should be in a
book to make it a bestseller?

    Tommy:
    A girl on the cover
    and
    no cover on the girl.

42.  Wife is dreaming in the middle of the night
and suddenly shouts: “Up! Quick! My husband is back!”

      Man gets up, jumps out of the window,
      hurts himself, and then realizes: “Damn, I am the husband!”

43.  Aftr engagemnt!
Girl:
Now stop looking at girls,u r commited now!

      Boy:
      Oho what do u mean,
      if i m on diet,
      that doesnt mean that i cant look at MENU . . :-D

44.  Teacher: Bobby! Join these two sentences together.

      I was cycling to school. I saw a dead body.

      Bobby: I saw a Dead Body Cycling to school. :-)

45.  ECG if u go out with wife
/l__,-.__/\_,_,-.

      ECG if u go out with girlfriend
     _/l_/l_/l_/l_/\_/\_

     ECG if wife catches u with girlfriend…
     /\________

46. “Interesting Confusions”

       1. Can u cry under water?

       2. Do fish ever get thirsty?

       3. Why don’t birds fall out of trees when they sleep?

       4. What do u call a male lady bird?

       5. Why is it called building when it’s already built?

       6. When they say dog food is new & improved in taste, who tastes it?

       7. If money doesn’t grow on trees then why banks have branches?

       8. Why does a round pizza come in sqaure box?

       9.Why doesn’t glue, stick to its bottle;-)..!!

47.  Who said English is easy???
Fill in the blanks with YES or NO.
1.______I don’t have Brain.…
2.______I don’t have Sense.…
3.______I am Stupid....

48.  A physiological study has proved that
all the fools, donkeys, monkeys
used their thumbs to read the messages
Don’t change your finger know its too late.